Recommendations based on "The Balancing Act: Creating Healthy Dependency and Connection Without Losing Yourself"

Based on your reading history, we think you will also enjoy the following books.

By Leonard Sax M.D. Ph.D.

A revised and updated edition (with more than 70% new material) of the evergreen classic about the innate differences between boys and girls and how best to parent and teach girls and boys successfully, with completely new chapters on sexual orientation and on transgender and intersex kids.Eleven years ago, Why Gender Matters broke ground in illuminating the differences between boys and girls--how they perceive the world differently, how they learn differently, how they process emotions and take risks differently. Dr. Sax argued that in failing to recognize these hardwired differences between boys and girls, we ended up reinforcing damaging stereotypes, medicalizing normal behavior (see: the rising rates of ADHD diagnosis), and failing to support kids to reach their full potential. In the intervening decade, the world has changed drastically, with an avalanche of new research which supports, deepens, and expands Dr. Sax's work. This revised and updated edition includes new findings about how boys and girls interact differently with social media and video games; a completely new discussion of research on gender non-conforming, LGB, and transgender kids, new findings about how girls and boys see differently, hear differently, and even smell differently; and new material about the medicalization of bad behavior.

By Esther Perel

"A fresh look at infidelity, broadening the focus from the havoc it wreaks within a committed relationship to consider also why people do it, what it means to them, and why breaking up is the expected response to duplicity — but not necessarily the wisest one.” — LA Review of Books From iconic couples’ therapist and bestselling author of Mating in Captivity comes a provocative and controversial look at infidelity with practical, honest, and empathetic advice for how to move beyond it. An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboo—universally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheat—even those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book. For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriage—with the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart. Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationships—what we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations. Fiercely intelligent, The State of Affairs provides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, “Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.”

By Vex King

Beloved spiritual teacher Vex King follows up his international bestseller Good Vibes, Good Life with this essential guide to building meaningful, mindful, and loving relationships.Humans are social animals. But it is nearly impossible to build healthy, sustainable bonds with others without first having a good relationship with yourself. To get along with others, we often alter our habits or subsume our unique personalities. By trying to transform or suppress our true selves, we erode our self-worth and self-knowledge. We begin to lose sight of who we really are and what we truly want. When our self-understanding and self-confidence are damaged, it ultimately hurts our relationships.In this wise and transformative book—a revised edition of Closer to Love—Vex King helps us find and sustain the connections we want with ourselves and others. Good relationships begin with loving ourselves and recognizing our own desires and needs. This self-discovery allows our best selves to radiate with confidence and to attract and choose partners—romantic and platonic—who are truly compatible. When we feel comfortable in our own skin, we are able to give and receive love without being blocked by the destructive emotions and past trauma that previously held us back and prevented us from forming fulfilling and lasting relationships.Filled with Vex King’s profound wisdom, thoughtful self-practices, and easy-to adopt-habit builders, this guide opens you up to the love you deserve and shows you how to bring it into your life.

By Jennifer Taitz

Single, less stressed, and freeIf you’re tired of swiping through dating apps, ghosting, and hearing well-meaning questions about why you’re still single, it’s hard not to feel “less-than” because you haven’t found your soul mate.Until now.How to Be Single and Happy is an empowering, compassionate guide to stop overanalyzing romantic encounters, get over regrets or guilt about past relationships, and identify what you want and need in a partner. But this isn’t just another dating book. Drawing on her extensive expertise as a clinical psychologist, as well as the latest research, hundreds of patient interviews, and key principles in positive psychology, Dr. Jennifer Taitz challenges the most common myths about women and love (like the advice to play hard to get). And while she teaches how to skillfully date, she’ll also help you cultivate the mindset, values, and connections that ensure you’ll live your best, happiest life, whether single or coupled up.

By Vienna Pharaon

From licensed therapist and popular Instagram relationship expert Vienna Pharaon comes a profound guide to understanding and overcoming wounds from your family of origin - the foundation of how we relate to others, ourselves, and the world around us. None of us had a perfect childhood; we are all carrying around behaviors that don't serve us - and may in fact be hurting us. But it doesn't have to be that way, says licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Vienna Pharaon. Our past might create our patterns, but we can change those patterns for the better with the right tools. In THE ORIGINS OF YOU, Pharaon has unlocked a healing process to help us understand our family of origin - the family and framework we grew up within - and examine what worked (and didn't) in that system. Certain dysfunctions (or "wounds") in that family of origin will manifest in our adult life in surprising ways, from work challenges to interpersonal struggles. But when armed with the knowledge about our past, we can rewire our programming to meaningfully improve our relationships and our lives. It doesn't matter whether you've been in therapy for decades, or whether therapy isn't for you. It doesn't matter if you have plenty of memories from childhood, or struggle to remember anything at all. All that matters is your willingness to look inside yourself, and your determination to find a new way forward. Complete with guided introspection, personal experiences, client stories, frameworks for having difficult conversations, and worksheets to complement each chapter, THE ORIGINS OF YOU will teach you how your family can both build you up and break you down - and how you can heal yourself for good.

By Toni Weschler

In celebration of its 20th anniversary, a thoroughly revised and expanded edition of the leading book on fertility and women’s reproductive health.Since the publication of Taking Charge of your Fertility two decades ago, Toni Weschler has taught a whole new generation of women how to become pregnant, avoid pregnancy naturally and gain better control of their gynecological and sexual health by taking just a couple minutes a day using the proven Fertility Awareness Method.Now, this 20th Anniversary Edition has been thoroughly revised and fully updated with: the latest medical advances in assisted reproductive technologies (ART) more in-depth coverage of women’s gynecological and sexual health new illustrations, photographs, and an expanded color insert new sample charts an expanded appendix Six new chapters including:Three Prevalent Conditions—Endometriosis, Ovarian Cysts andPCOSNatural Ways to Balance Your HormonesPreserving Your Future FertilityMiscarriagesIdiopathic InfertilityCauses of Unusual BleedingClear and comprehensive, yet warm and approachable, Taking Charge of Your Fertility is one of the most universally lauded health books on the market today. It is an essential reference for every woman of reproductive age.

By Sue Johnson

Heralded by the New York Times and Time magazine as the couple therapy with the highest rate of success, Emotionally Focused Therapy works because it views the love relationship as an attachment bond. This idea, once controversial, is now supported by science, and has become widely popular among therapists around the world. In HOLD ME TIGHT, Dr. Sue Johnson presents Emotionally Focused Therapy to the general public for the first time. Johnson teaches that the way to save and enrich a relationship is to reestablish safe emotional connection and preserve the attachment bond. With this in mind, she focuses on key moments in a relationship-from Recognizing the Demon Dialogue to Revisiting a Rocky Moment-and uses them as touchpoints for seven healing conversations. Through case studies from her practice, illuminating advice, and practical exercises, couples will learn how to nurture their relationships and ensure a lifetime of love.

By Henry Cloud, John Townsend

Insights for romance to help you grow in freedom, honesty, and self-control as you pursue healthy dating limits that can lead to a happy marriage. How do you set smart limits on your physical relationship? How much do you get involved financially? And how do you know if you've found your future spouse? Dating can be fun, but it's not always easy to navigate the questions and intricacies along the way. In Boundaries in Dating, Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend, counselors and authors of the New York Times bestseller Boundaries, share their practical advice for adding healthy boundaries to your dating life. Full of insightful, real-life examples, this book will give you the tools you need to: Recognize and choose quality over perfection in a dating partner. Prioritize friendship within your relationship. Preserve friendships by separating between platonic relationships and romantic interest. Move past denial to handle real relational problems in a realistic and hopeful way. Enjoy this season of life.   Boundaries in Dating unfolds a wise, biblical path to developing self-control, freedom, and intimacy. Let Drs. Cloud and Townsend help you get to know yourself, solve problems, and enjoy the journey of dating and finding your life partner.

By Harriet Lerner

When The Dance of Deceptionwas published, Lerner discovered that women were not eager to identify with the subject. "Well, I don't do deception" was a common resonse. We all "do deception", often with the intention to protect ourselves and the relationships we depend on. The Dance of Deceptionunravels the ways (and whys) that women show the false and hide the real -- even to our own selves. We see how relationships are affected by lying and faking, by silence and pretending and by brave -- but misguided -- efforts to tell the truth. Truth-telling is at the heart of what is most central in women's lives. It is at the foundation of authenticity and creativity, intimacy and joy. Yet in the name of "honesty", we can bludgeon each other. We can approach a difficult issue with such a poor sense of timing and tact that we can actually shut down the lines of communication rather than widening the path of truth-telling. Sometimes Lerner's advice takes a surprising turn -- for example, when she asks us to engage in a bold act of pretending in order to discover something "more real"; or when she tells us not to parachute down on our family to bring up a "hot issue" without laying the necessary groundwork first. Whether the subject is affairs, family secrets, sexual faking or the challenge of "being oneself", Lerner helps us to discover, speak and live our own truths.

By Oliver J. Morgan

2020 Award Winner for the Independent Press Award in the category of Addiction & Recovery. A new model of addiction that incorporates neurobiology, social relationships, and ecological systems.Understanding addiction is no longer just about understanding neurons or genes, broken brain functioning, learning, or faulty choices. Oliver J. Morgan provides a fresh take on addiction and recovery by presenting a more inclusive framework than traditional understanding. Cutting- edge work in attachment, interpersonal neurobiology, and trauma is integrated with ecological- systems thinking to provide a consilient and comprehensive picture of addiction. Humans are born into connection and require nourishing relationships for healthy living. Adversities, however, bring fragmentation and create the conditions for ill health. They create vulnerabilities. In order to cope, individuals can turn to alternatives, “substitute relationships” that ease the pain of disconnection. These can become addictions. Addiction, Attachment, Trauma, and Recovery presents a model, a method, and a mandate. This new focus calls for change in the established ways we think and behave about addiction and recovery. It reorients understanding and clinical practice for mental health and addiction counselors, psychologists, and social workers, as well as for addicts and those who love them.