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von Esther Perel
"A fresh look at infidelity, broadening the focus from the havoc it wreaks within a committed relationship to consider also why people do it, what it means to them, and why breaking up is the expected response to duplicity — but not necessarily the wisest one.” — LA Review of Books From iconic couples’ therapist and bestselling author of Mating in Captivity comes a provocative and controversial look at infidelity with practical, honest, and empathetic advice for how to move beyond it. An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboo—universally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheat—even those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book. For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriage—with the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart. Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationships—what we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations. Fiercely intelligent, The State of Affairs provides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, “Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.”
von Sheila Wray Gregoire
Billions of people have had sex. Far fewer have made love. In the Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex, author Sheila Wray Gregoire helps women see how sexual intimacy was designed to be physically stupendous but also incredibly intimate.Whether you're about to walk down the aisle or you've been married for decades, The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex will lead you on a wonderful journey of discovery towards the amazing sex life God designed you for.With humor, research, and lots of anecdotes, author Sheila Wray Gregoire helps women see how our culture's version of sex, which concentrates on the physical above all else, makes sex shallow. God, on the other hand, intended sex to unite us physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Gregoire walks through these three aspects of sex, showing how to make each amazing, and how to overcome the roadblocks in each area we often encounter.Drawing on survey results from over 2,000 people, she also includes lots of voices from other Good Girls, giving insight into how other women have learned to truly enjoy sex in marriage.
von John Gottman
From the country’s foremost relationship expert and New York Times bestselling author Dr. John M. Gottman comes a powerful, simple five-step program, based on twenty years of innovative research, for greatly improving all of the relationships in your life—with spouses and lovers, children, siblings, and even your colleagues at work.Gottman provides the tools you need to make your relationships thrive. In The Relationship Cure, Dr. Gottman:- Reveals the key elements of healthy relationships, emphasizing the importance of what he calls “emotional connection”- Introduces the powerful new concept of the emotional “bid,” the fundamental unit of emotional connection- Provides remarkably empowering tools for improving the way you bid for emotional connection and how you respond to others’ bids- And more!Packed with fascinating questionnaires and exercises developed in his therapy, The Relationship Cure offers a simple but profound program that will fundamentally transform the quality of all of the relationships in your life.
von Deepak Chopra M.D.
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A remarkable fusion of Eastern wisdom and Western practicality that offers strategies for clearing away the obstacles to love your life, for restoring the boundless soul of love, and for finding romance that will last a lifetime.Drawing on the Vedic texts of India and other great wisdom traditions, Dr. Deepak Chopra describes the seven stages of love, beginning and culminating in ecstasy. At each stage we hear stories like those of Clare, who only falls in love with unattainable men; of Frankie and Della, whose eight-year-old marriage has become a battleground of distrust; and of Gail and Jarrett, who near retirement without understanding how they will fit together into their new lives. As we see these couples overcome their obstacles, and as we work through a series of specific exercises, we anchor these lessons in our own experience.We all know the only way to enjoy the ecstasy of true romance for a lifetime is first to discover love within ourselves, but this task has often proved too difficult. Until now. In The Path to Love, you will find an astonishing blueprint to the uncharted territory of your own heart. First, Dr. Chopra orients us with timeless wisdom and contemporary real-life examples, then guides us step by step on the path to love. And once we discover the love inside ourselves, we start to see it everywhere—in lovers, husbands, wives, mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, friends—until our own lives become self-sustaining acts of passion, romantic and fulling and miraculous.
von Emily Nagoski PhD
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • From the author of Come as You Are and co-author of Burnout comes an illuminating exploration of how to maintain a happy sex life in a long-term relationship.“Emily Nagoski is a national treasure—helping us all understand how to finally build true, joyful, confident sex lives.”—Glennon Doyle, author of UntamedIn Come as You Are, Emily Nagoski, PhD, revolutionized the way we think about women’s sexuality. Now, in Come Together, Nagoski takes on a fundamentally misunderstood subject: sex in long-term relationships.Most of us struggle at some point to maintain a sexual connection with our partner/s or spouse. And many of us are given not-very-good advice on what to do about it. In this book, Nagoski dispels the myths we’ve been taught about sex—for instance, the belief that sexual satisfaction and desire are highest at the beginning of a relationship and that they inevitably decline the longer that relationship lasts. Nagoski assures us that’s not true.So, what is true? Come Together isn’t about how much we want sex, or how often we’re having it; it’s about whether we like the sex we’re having. Nagoski breaks down the obstacles that impede us from enjoying sex—from stress and body image to relationship difficulties and gendered beliefs about how sex “should” be—and presents the best ways to overcome them. You’ll learn:• that “spontaneous desire” is not the kind of desire to strive for if you want to have great sex for decades• vocabulary for talking with partners about ways to get in “the mood” and how to not take it personally when “the mood” is nowhere to be found• how to understand your own and your partner’s “emotional floorplan,” so that you have a blueprint for how to get to a sexy state of mindWritten with scientific rigor, humor, and compassion, Nagoski shows us what great sex can look like, how to create it in our own lives, and what to do when struggles arise.
von Herbert L. Gravitz, Julie D. Bowden
Rich with insight and awareness, Recovery explores the secrets, fears, hopes and issues that confront adult children of alcoholics. Authors and widely respected therapists and ACOA workshop leaders Herbert Gravitz and Julie Bowden detail in a clear question-and-answer format the challenges of control and inadequacy that ACOAs face as they struggle for recovery and understanding, stage-by-stage: Survival * Emergent Awareness * Core Issues * Transformations * Integration * Genesis. If you feel troubled by your post, Recovery will start you on the path of self-awareness, as it explores the searching questions adult children of alcoholics seek to hove answered: * How con I overcome my need for control? * Do all ACOAs ploy the some kind of roles in the family? * How do I overcome my fear of intimacy? * What is all-or-none functioning? * How can ACOAs maintain self-confidence and awareness after recovery? * How do ACOAs handle the family after understanding its influence? * And many other important questions about your post, family and feelings. Written with warmth, joy and real understanding, Recovery will inspire you to meet the challenges of the post and overcome the obstacles to your happiness.
Fighting for Our Friendships The Science and Art of Conflict and Connection in Women's Relationships
von Danielle B. Jackson
Bumble BFF's resident friend expert identifies the 9 most common conflict types in women's platonic relationships, sharing practical strategies to resolve issues and strengthen ties. Fighting for Our Friendships is the Queen Bees for adult women, teaching readers how to identifying the problems in their relationships with other women (often fostered by societal pressure to compete) and, of even greater importance, how to cultivate, strengthen, and sustain them. This book will be the handbook that readers wish they had sooner. Using a combination of psychology, science, narrative, and a few of author Danielle Bayard Jackson's signature scripts and out-of-the-box exercises, readers will learn: - The 9 types of friendship conflicts (The Gossip, The Needy Friend, The Jealous Friend, and more) - The whys behind some of our most common friendship problems - What to say in those "wtf" moments when your friend tries you with a crazy remark - How to better understand a friend who seems jealous, clingy, angry, passive, or insecure - How to ask the right questions in the moment to avoid a misunderstanding - New ways of approaching tough issues with friends so that the conflict actually *gasp* brings you closer In a time when there's no shortage of talk about cutting friends off, it's time to look at how we can keep our friendships going. In a world pushing us to opt out at any sign of friction, Bayard Jackson is here to show us how to opt in.
von Katherine Woodward Thomas
The classic guide to finding love and creating life-altering miracles of happiness and fulfillment, now revised and updated with new insights, stories, teaching points, and transformational exercises. Are you frustrated by stymied relationships, missed connections, and the loneliness of the search for someone to spend the rest of your life with? In this classic, updated guide to finding deep happiness in love, licensed marriage and family therapist Katherine Woodward Thomas bridges the gap between wanting to find true love and being truly available to create a fulfilling relationship. Love-seekers today have to deal with a precarious terrain of dating and partnering that seems to encourage a lack of commitment and clarity. Calling in “The One” will empower you to have a radically different experience by shifting your painful patterns in love from the inside out, graduating you from unsatisfying relationships and unleashing your power to manifest the happy, healthy love you desire. Based on the Law of Attraction, which is the concept that we attract what we’re ready to receive, the provocative yet simple forty-nine-day program includes a daily lesson, a corresponding practice, and instructions for putting that lession into action in your life. Manifesting meditations, powerful visualizations, and clarifying journal exercises will lead you to recognize and release your hidden inner obstacles to love and help you grow beyond them. At the end of the course, you will be in the ideal state of mind to go out into the world and find your "One." An inspirational approach that offers a life-affirming philosophy on relationships, Calling in “The One” is your guide to finding and keeping the love you seek.
von Linda Dillow, Lorraine Pintus
Intimate Issues answers the twenty-one questions about sex most frequently asked by Christian wives, as determined by a nationwide poll of over one thousand women. Written from the perspective of two mature Christian wives and Bible teachers–women who you’ll come to know as teachers and friends–Intimate Issues is biblical and informative: sometimes humorous, other times practical, but always honest. Through its solid teaching warm testimonials, scriptural insights, and experts’ advise, you’ll find resolution for your questions and fears, surprising insights about God’s perspective on sex, and a variety of practical and creative ideas for enhancing your physical relationship with the husband you love. With warmth and wisdom, authors Linda Dillow and Lorraine Pintus speak woman to woman: examining the teachings of Scripture, exposing the lies of the world, and offering real hope that every woman’s marriage relationship can become all it was intended to be in God’s design.
von Harriet Lerner
When The Dance of Deceptionwas published, Lerner discovered that women were not eager to identify with the subject. "Well, I don't do deception" was a common resonse. We all "do deception", often with the intention to protect ourselves and the relationships we depend on. The Dance of Deceptionunravels the ways (and whys) that women show the false and hide the real -- even to our own selves. We see how relationships are affected by lying and faking, by silence and pretending and by brave -- but misguided -- efforts to tell the truth. Truth-telling is at the heart of what is most central in women's lives. It is at the foundation of authenticity and creativity, intimacy and joy. Yet in the name of "honesty", we can bludgeon each other. We can approach a difficult issue with such a poor sense of timing and tact that we can actually shut down the lines of communication rather than widening the path of truth-telling. Sometimes Lerner's advice takes a surprising turn -- for example, when she asks us to engage in a bold act of pretending in order to discover something "more real"; or when she tells us not to parachute down on our family to bring up a "hot issue" without laying the necessary groundwork first. Whether the subject is affairs, family secrets, sexual faking or the challenge of "being oneself", Lerner helps us to discover, speak and live our own truths.