Fourteen-year-old Hattie Moore doesn't actually know who her father is - but that's the least of her problems. How can she become a TOTAL HOTNESS GODDESS when Miss Gorgeous Knickers at school hates her and no one fancies her because she has no breast? And her family are an actual nightmare. Her unbelievably annoying brother is EVIL and on top of that, her gran is a TOTAL mental who may be texting rude jokes to just about EVERYONE in the world. Including her dentist. Hattie's diary of this tumultuous year is an absolutely hilarious account of the ups and downs of teenage life including a dating bogey phobia, near death from biscotti and a home-made breast-growing machine.